Grief is a natural response to loss. It is deeply personal and can have emotional, physical, and psychological effects that significantly interfere with daily functioning. In my work as a Grief Support Volunteer for Griefline, I regularly talk with individuals about grief.
I began volunteering in August 2024. Before supporting callers on the helpline, I was required to complete Griefline’s training program. The training includes self-paced, online modules, ranging from “Grief and Loss Fundamentals” to “Telephone Support Techniques”, and online workshops to demonstrate the necessary practical skills.
Volunteers are supported with access to online tools and resources as well as peer support, debriefing, counselling, supervision, and ongoing professional development.
As a Grief Support Volunteer, I have found supervisor debriefing sessions an invaluable part of my own self-care and learning. Debriefing allows me to reflect on difficult conversations, explore my emotions, and develop skills. It has helped me to build resilience and avoid compassion fatigue.
The role is challenging. I talk to people who are distressed, confused, and struggling with the intense and uncomfortable emotions of grief.
Many callers have experienced the death of family and friends, but we receive calls for many types of loss. People grieve the loss of pets, the loss of relationships, the loss of employment, the loss of health, or the loss of safety or security.
Sometimes their grief relates to an impending loss that hasn’t occurred yet. This is known as a “living loss”. It is often experienced by the family and friends of those with terminal illnesses or neurocognitive disorders such as dementia.
Unfortunately, many callers are alone in their loss. Due to personal circumstances, they don’t have a social support network they can turn to in their time of grief. They feel isolated and scared.
To support them, I show empathy, engage in active listening, and use basic counselling skills. I provide space for them to explore and express their grief without judgement. For many, the simple act of talking about their emotions can help them to begin to process the pain of their loss.
For those seeking coping strategies, I suggest maintaining a routine, regular exercise and physical activity, journalling, and reaching out to family and friends.
I often gently remind them that there is no “right” way to grieve. The process is not linear, and no two people will have the same experience of grief.
Healing takes time, and people need to allow themselves space to grieve. Grieving is not about “getting over it” or “moving on”; it’s about learning to live alongside the grief. Over time, and with self-reflection and support, it is possible to find meaning in loss.
To paraphrase Carl Rogers: When you can accept your grief, just as it is, then you can heal.
Photo by Nick Fewings on Unsplash
Hi James, thank you for sharing such a thoughtful and grounded reflection on your work with Grief line. I really appreciated how clearly you conveyed the emotional complexity of the role and the importance of offering space without judgment.
Your mention of “living loss” stood out to me—especially in the context of anticipatory grief. It reminded me how often people carry silent, ongoing grief that doesn’t always get recognized. I’m curious, do you find that callers going through this kind of loss respond differently to support than those grieving a death?
I also really connected with what you said about debriefing as part of self-care. It’s something I’ve been learning to prioritize myself, and it’s encouraging to hear how it’s helped your resilience.
Thanks again for sharing—you’ve given me a lot to think about.
Hi Jessica,
Thank you so much for your kind words and for taking the time to comment.
Your point regarding the silent, ongoing nature of anticipatory grief rings true for me. Because the loss hasn’t occurred yet, it is often unacknowledged, but it is still a heavy emotional burden.
In my experience, callers navigating anticipatory grief may respond quite differently to support. There can be a sense of confusion or guilt around their grief, which can make it harder for them to express their feelings. In those cases, offering them space to name and explore their grief can be incredibly validating.
I’m glad to hear that you’re prioritising debriefing too. It’s something I used to underestimate, but I now see it as an essential part of my self-care.
Thanks again for taking the time to comment.